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Sex – Are Oldies Past It?

It’s not surprising that there are many common misconceptions about sex and ageing. After all, it’s normal for sexual feelings (desire, behaviour) to change with age. While older people may have less intercourse as they get older as their sex life may slow down, sex is still important for most of them.

You’d be buying into a stereotype to conclude that oldies don’t have sex. Oldies (60+) need to keep their sexual energy and connection intact.

A new kind of sexuality can emerge with age, one that focuses on whole body intimacy and the value of human connections. Indeed, late-life sex should be seen in the context of a broader human experience involving intimacy, companionship, pleasure, and love. The reality is that there’s nothing about age preventing oldies from having frisky, frequent, and fun sex. No one needs to have a photoshopped body to qualify: others are never as critical about our body as we are.

It’s a myth that sex belongs to the young. Research shows that sex and romance are firmly on the minds of many older adults (oldies are the fastest growing demographic using online dating sites). We are designed to live longer, better if we have an active sex life. Sexual contact can lead to better health, higher relationship satisfaction, and improved stress management (of course, Woody Allen says that sex alleviates tension, and love causes it).

Maintaining a satisfying sex life as you get older is even easier when you:

  1. Stay sexually fit – getting yourself physically fit, increasing the frequency of sex, and balancing mind and body (that ‘old fart’ you might think you see in the mirror needn’t be you).
  2. Try outercourse – a term used to describe a wide variety of erotic experiences that don’t include penetrative sex. Outercourse is all about pleasure and connectedness.
  3. Improve your communication. Communication is key to a satisfying sex life, so be honest and open with your partner. Communicate your thoughts, fears, and desires with him or her. Getting on could lead to getting it on.

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